CelestialMIDIRender

Please note: if you see any URL here, this is just to add to the immersion. There are no actual working links here. Please see the following Meta Disclaimers below.

Meta Disclaimers

Please read the following as it contains meta-information regarding this project.

  1. This is a parody of the Aranara MIDI Render Series if it was led by an EA ex-ceo or something. If you actually want to render your MIDIs (with the real Aranara MIDI Render) without the crap this thing has, click here instead. This project is literally identical to Aranara MIDI Render Toolkit Release 1.2 with a ton of transactions. (Lore: I made the code for Aranara MIDI Render Toolkit Release 1.2 public and it so happened that 1.3 and onwards are protected with the Guidelines.)
  2. The creator “SolaricZuli” is purely fictional and any resemblance to other people with the same namesake is purely fictional. This being said, sites such as https://solariczuli.com do NOT exist. Please do not actually attempt to connect to that specific URL since it leads to nowhere. If it leads to somewhere and THIS Meta Disclaimer explicitly states that there IS NO such site, then that site is purely unrelated to “Celestial MIDI Render” and could potentially harbor malicious content.
  3. The shop function does not request real money as it is purely a parody and not meant to profit off of anyone! This is strictly stipulated in the "Rules and Guidelines" section for the usage of Aranara and Faelei MIDI Software, which can be seen [here](https://daniferous.github.io/aranara-midi-player-sb3/guidelines/). Therefore, if you come across a MIDI Program that looks, feels, and IS the same as either the Celestial MIDI Render or Aranara MIDI Render program that ASKS for any banking information, DO NOT GIVE THEM ANY OF THOSE, AND LEAVE/DELETE THAT PROGRAM IMMEDIATELY. Chances are, it would be a scam or may contain bad stuff which I (Dani) am very much against.1
  4. Celestial MIDI Render’s custom importer is a fork of the AraMIDI conversion tool, with some features “borrowed” from its Faelei branch. For now, I might only provide the executable (since I don’t really want to make another branch) available in this repository (as a release!).2
  5. The MIDI Format “.celesmidi” contains partial support for CC Events, though a vast majority of those are either visual or technical. Such technical “CC Events” could manipulate the program’s code (by only affecting the variables/lists and arbitrarily running Events/Broadcasts), but everything is sandboxed within the Renderer therefore it is safe. If you somehow managed to irreversibly damage Celestial MIDI Render, reload (if on browser) or redownload (if an sb3 file is provided) and everything will be as if nothing had happened.
  6. Your progress (AKA your “Celestial Account”) DOES NOT SAVE. Just like with Lost Lurker Game (Beta 1.1), your progress does not persist once you leave, close, or reload the program. I might add a way to save/load progresses (I did at an earlier build, but scrapped it since it would not make sense if Celestial MIDI Render were actually an online service).3 This being said, the “account services” on this website (in the future, I might include a pretend sign-in/log-in prompt that does nothing) has no function whatsoever and will repeatedly throw an Error. Once again, reminding you to NOT put your real account credentials, even in parody projects like these.
  7. Always remember: This is a parody project and is not intended to be taken seriously. It is simply a simulation as to what if a MIDI Rendering Program - One that was either free to use or purchasable at a one-time fee (or a simpler subscription model) - were to function like a Mobile Game: with Advertisements, Terrible In-Program Purchases, etc. And no, the market for MIDI Rendering is very niche and there are an abundance of MIDI Rendering software, so the idea of a “Celestial MIDI Renderer” would probably not be profitable.

Please remember all this to ensure your safety and enjoyment, probably, as you traverse through this… thing.

Click here to return back to main menu and pretend you did not see this for the immersion, or click any of the links below on the Navigation Portal!

Navigation Portal

Main Menu

Render Now! - Release 1.3 Build 4

View My Celestial Account

Check out the Celestial Concourse for new deals!

Read the Celestial MIDI Render - End User License Agreement

More about MIDI Specifications

Celestial MIDI Software Support Page (Note: This site actually does not “exist”, and will lead you to a page that hints at the support page being nonexistent. This note will only appear here.)

Footnotes

  1. Which is ironic, considering that the whole premise of “Celestial MIDI Render” is that it rips you off. ↩

  2. It is really just intended terrible coding. This is intended to simulate how the development team has no regard for optimisation, but the general idea that “more is better”. ↩

  3. …I probably should work more on Lost Lurker Game more than… this. ↩